10

DAY 10:

I slept very, very well last night. It was truly fantastic. I didn’t have a headache today, I didn’t have any cravings really. But I still don’t have an appetite. I didn’t have a snack today and I found my energy waning toward the end of my work day. I knew, most likely, it was a calorie deficit causing the trouble, but I just didn’t want to eat anything.

I’m having a lot of trouble determining which things I’m dealing with mentally and physically are related to whole 30, and which are related to the stress I’m feeling at work. My class this year is very challenging, causing quite a bit of physical and emotional fatigue. I can’t quite tell if the irritation and general discontent are related to the changes my body is going through while drastically changing my eating style or from dealing with a really difficult work day.

My other problem is that I know that working out would help with my blue/blah feelings, but I feel so run down I just don’t want to. I’m going to make a huge effort tomorrow to make it to a yoga class at the rec, so I can try out my new plan of using yoga for body healing and stress relieving as well as fitness. I’m hoping this might help with some of my general moodiness right now.

I know days 10 and 11 are some of the hardest, but I feel like I’m making really great breakthroughs right now, in all facets of being healthy. I made dinner tonight, even though I was tired, cranky, and considered at least 6 times not cooking and just having leftovers. Stephen and I even discussed in detail whether or not we could get by without me cooking. Through all that, I just maintained a desire to cook tonight. It was HUGE for me. Generally in the past I would use any excuse to get out of cooking. Tonight I just never seriously considered not cooking. I thought about it, we talked about it, but I knew through all that I was still going to cook.

I’m also learning how to be healthier when it comes to my personal life. I have such a hard time saying no to people, especially when it comes from someone I love a lot. But today I said no to something I really didn’t want to do. I was proud of myself, and I admire my ability to know what I need, which is some down time to myself when Stephen is working and I can relax and take care of me.

I think all I have left to do is get my physical routine on track. I would like to find some workouts that really work for me. I feel like in the past I have forced my body into what I thought would be the most effective, despite any signs it was giving me that it could not handle it. I want to approach it with a little different attitude this time. I want to get in better shape, but I don’t want to destroy my body in the process. I’m feeling pretty hopeful about this yoga idea. It is making me both excited and anxious to try it. I’m really hoping it doesn’t let me down.

Menu for today:

Breakfast: standard apple and chicken sausage with seasoned pea pods

Lunch: leftover ribs and bacon-y brussels sprouts

Dinner: egg roll stir fry. It was a new recipe given to me by a health conscious coworker. I don’t have it online to link to it. I liked it, I had to change the recipe a little to substitute coconut aminos for soy sauce, and olive oil for vegetable oil. It needed salt, but it was pretty good. It was definitely easy, which I dig on a day like today.

Here’s to hoping that I get past my mental block and find some peace in yoga.

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